I want to be me

Wow it’s been a very long time since I last log in here. So wat am thinking rite now? I would say tat am not very sure. Got too many things running thru my head now, in fact at the moment? If I look back at my life, I think I would go crazy only if I am alone but the Good thing is I am not alone. Thnk God that I have His Love and His spirit with me I am able to survive thus this far. I am happy to be able to make new friends more. I love to make friends. No matter who u r, I don’t care bout ur past, ur present or anything, I mean I don’t care who u r, even if u r a hooker I don’t mind be friend vit ya….No limits in friendship juz anywhere I can be myself. I am who I am. I really feel tired being someone else, all this bcoz I am afraid of getting hurt. Trust me when I say it’s hurtful. Really pain, I tell u not easy to get rid of this hurt in ur life, believe me. It is easy to forgive but to forget it’s hard, I mean yes v can forget but the scar is still there, reminding u of the pain. Not easy at all. I love my friends. No matter who u r. If u r my friend, I am happy to know you. But very seldom am I able to find friend tat I can juz be me. Very hard. Extremely hard. People don’t get my intention well and b4 I manage to be friend they start to despise me. Hurtful but wat to do u r rejected by them who go after riches, looks and fame. I don’t care. I am me, I am happy to be me. I care for my friends well, but sometimes it’s hard for me to understand their needs. Like they are very fast to change their needs and sometimes they tend to hurt each other. To be a peace maker is not easy thou but am glad to be 1. But hard to keep up, I mean not to offend any party. Since I came here, I been crazily referred by my roommates. It’s good that I can help them but I am not an angel, I juz a mere human. Juz me, Tenes I prone to make mistakes and mostly I purposely erred but yes that’s me. I too hope tat I can have air to breath, but when I think about it, I guess I am satisfy as long I can be at any help for u. I am ur friend, no matter what mess u make, I will try my best to clear it for u for the sake of friendship. But I don’t want to be used as toilet tissue and thrown away at the end. I am a human, I need friends too, I need help too, am not perfect. Pray tat He will help me to have friends that willing to do wat I do to them. Juz be they to me. I want tat. Thou it is very hard to find but I believe one day I would. Hope the day would come soon….i am getting tired of waiting………